The Disappearing Gwar Post

Firstly, thanks to all who commented, emailed, and offered their support through this trying and troubling time. The way the blogosphere came together on this one was really heartwarming. This calls for a group hug. Ummm… I don’t know… hug your computer or something.

The legacy of the elusive Gwar post (the story thus far):

Let me see if I can paint an accurate picture of the world during the time of this tragedy. The year was 2005. It was a cold and blustery November, as I recall. I had just finished a monstrous post about tagging and categories that, I’m sure, bored the living bejesus out of my three regular readers (hi mom!). I had been putting it off for as long as possible, but it was inevitable… I had to write a follow-up post at some point. But how could I gracefully bring the quality of posts back down to the regular sam bot dot com standards? I had outdone myself… or so I had thought.

And then the solution hit me… like an epiphany… of pain. In fact, the sensation was not unlike a good-morning-kick-to-the-groin; sharp and jarring, yet eye-opening and spiritual. I would bring the quality back down by introducing a Gwar analogy. Perfect!

And so it was done. And there was much rejoicing.

And then it disappeared off of Bloggers server. And there was probably much more rejoicing… but none by me.

And so it was reposted. Yea!

And then it disappeared. Boo!

And so it was reposted. Yea!

And then it disappeared. Boo!

And then there was bean dip (for some reason). Yea! Which brings us to now… where we stand on the cusp of a momentous event. Here, for the fourth and final time, I am going to post the notorious Gwar post. Read it while you can, because ten minutes from now, it is likely to disappear into the void.

So, without further adieu, I give you the Gwar post:

Bringing the Bar Back Down. Way Down.
(originally posted on Tuesday, November 15, 2005 at 12:36 a.m.)

I’d hate to be the band scheduled to play following Gwar’s set. It’s not that Gwar is an amazing pack of musicians… no, quite the contrary. It’s more the question of how one could possibly follow an act like theirs? I mean Oderus Urungus, Gwar’s frontman, comes on stage looking like Conan the Barbarian dipped in acid, vomited on by satan, and then treated to a shopping spree at the local Hot Topic. The band, during their set, spews gallons of (presumably fake) blood onto the audience, sends fans through the “meat grinder,” and lights stuff on fire! Honestly… how do you follow that!?

Similarly, how do I follow a post like the last one? It was like a zillion words long, full of academic splendor, and included the perfect accompanying photo! I suppose, I’ll have to be content with a post such as this. Instead of writing Pulitzer Prize winning phases like, “the current state of excitement amongst information organizationophiles,” I’ll have to be satisfied with intellectually devoid articulations such as, “dipped in acid, vomited on by satan, and then treated to a shopping spree at the local Hot Topic.”

It’s comforting to know that here, at sam bot dot com, raising the bar only leads to a temporary predicament. Just give it some time and I’ll bring that bar back down… way down.

An important and relevant addition to the above post: Gwar blogs! Each member (in character) maintains a blog on their site. Click to read:
Oderus Urungus’s blog
Balsac’s blog
Flattus Maximus’s blog
Beefcake the Mighty’s blog
JiZMak’s blog
slaves’s blog

Bean Dip of the Apocalypse

Conspiracy theorist, blogger, and advocate of the anti-corn movement, Nacho Intolerant, writes, “Could you have been flagged…This is a relatively new feature on blogger. I have not employed it, and frankly, have no idea what sort of events it puts into motion.” She goes on to speculate that “the Freemasons and Clear Channel may be invloved.” I wonder if her doomsaying has any legitimacy to it? After all, it was sam bot dot com, in all it’s controversial glory, that put me on the National Do Not fly list (unconfirmed… but what else could it be? I’m a threat to the establishment. That’s so punk rock!).

Blogger hasn’t responded to my whining… and I doubt that they will. But here is what Blogger has to say about the “Flag” button: “This feature is called “Flag As Objectionable” and it’s accessible via the Blogger Navbar. The “Flag?” button allows the blogging community to easily note questionable content…” Questionable content? Blogger, oh please… What could possibly be considered questionable about the Gwar post? Satan vomiting on Conan the Barbarian? That’s not questionable. Tasteless, perhaps… but definitely not questionable.

What’s questionable is Blogger’s inclusion of such a feature* (ummm… hello? Freedom of speech?). But who knows? Maybe I haven’t been flagged. Maybe it is a blatant act of censorship, as the Nomad suggests. Jim, however, has experienced similar annoyances (Jim, what do your two disappearing posts, and my Gwar post have in common?). He recommends reposting from scratch. I’ll give it one more try.

Hmmm… so what could it be? Could the culprit be the Freemasons? No, they’ve got secret organizations to run. Clear Channel? Those monopolistic good ol’ boys have a populous to manipulate… sam bot dot com speaks to the underground! I’m no threat to them… or am I?

Okay. I know what’s really going on here. Someone on the Blogger team got fake blood in their eye at a Gwar show. Ever since then, they’ve sought to destroy the blogs of those who endorse Gwar and support the Scumdogs of the Universe.

I can see through the lies… and the truth ain’t pretty. Ain’t pretty at all.

* To their credit, Blogger does put the following opening statement in front of their Flagging info page: “The Flag button is not censorship and it cannot be manipulated by angry mobs. Political dissent? Incendiary opinions? Just plain crazy? Bring it on.” It’s comforting to know that Blogger is on the side of the “just plain crazy.” If that’s truly the case, sam bot dot com will always have a home at Blogger.

Bean Dip… Part II

Grumble grumble…

So now what? The last test post worked flawlessly. What’s the deal with my Gwar post then!? Is there something in it that Blogger doesn’t like? What could it be? Is Blogger just anti-Gwar?

For those of you who haven’t been following this tragedy, this here’s what’s been a’happenin’: I post an entry about Gwar (still to be found on my server here). Ten of your earth minutes later, while attempting to leave a comment (yes, I leave comments on my own blog. It makes me feel as though I have a rich and fascinating social life), I find that Blogger has removed the post from their servers… after they have successfully posted it to my blog! Wha!? I repost the entry. Everything is working splendidly. And then, ten minutes later, it’s gone! I repeated this process thrice. And all thrice times three times yielded the same result. So, in an effort to pinpoint the problem, I posted that test post yesterday. If it fails, then clearly something is wrong with Blogger. If it succeeds, then something is wrong with my Gwar post.

If you’ll notice, yesterday’s post is still active and recognized by Blogger. Therefore, the problem lies somewhere within the Gwar post. But where!?

I summon the collective knowledge of the blogosphere. Help!

Bean Dip!?

Bloodclot!

What’s wrong with you Blogger!? Why do you remove my Gwar post from your server, 10 minutes after you successfully post it? Sorry to all of you who have tried to post a comment. Blogger thinks the post doesn’t exist.

Consider this post to be a test. If Blogger successfully publishes this… and it stays on their server for more than 10 minutes, I’ll know that there is something wacky with my Gwar post (what the heck could it be!?). If, however, this post disappears too, then I’ll know it’s all Blogger’s fault… and I’ll be that much closer to becoming a WordPress user.

Blogger has frustrated me in the past. They’ve always redeemed themselves though. Nothing beats ’em for ease of use. And, at the end of the day, that’s what matters. Right? Or is it bean dip? “Blogger, where’s my bean dip?” says my housemate, Carrie. “Blogger owes you bean dip!” Thanks Carrie. Thanks for getting my back on this one… I think.

Categories Are Dead, Long Live the Tag!

One of, if not the, biggest frustration for any hardcore Blogger user, is Blogger’s refusal to offer categories within an otherwise kick-ass and criticism-free blogging service. (How’s that for a summary, intro, sentence thingy?)

Categories, when deployed appropriately, are a very slick addition to any blogger’s arsenal. In a nutshell, they allow a singular blog to house entries ranging in a variety of topics. The blog, of course, will contain a main page which acts as a dumping ground for all of the author’s posts. Maybe “dumping ground” isn’t the most accurate language to use here. The main page, more precisely, acts as an unfiltered stream of all the author’s posts, aggregated into one source. The author can then assign a category to each post and, in addition to being featured on the main page, the entry will be found on that category’s page. The blogging service is intelligent enough to handle the main stream as well as multiple categories comprised of posts found therein. Neato!

Let’s take a look at sam bot dot com. Here, I post about a wide variety of immensely rich and infinitely fascinating subject matter. Yes, infinitely fascinating. In any given month, I can be found to write about Opeth, coffee, Apple, coffee, technology, and coffee. Clearly, you as a devoted reader, are infinitely fascinated in everything that I write… but, for the sake of argument, let’s say that you are simply interested in enjoying my thoughts about Apple Computers. Well, dear reader, you’re in luck. It just so happens that in this imaginary scenario, I have established a category for all of my posts where the subject matter falls within the realm of Apple Computers. You can now ignore everything else that I post about and simply focus on Apple by reading only that category. And, if I’m a sophisticated blogger, which I am, I would have established an RSS feed just for that category… ’cause I’m just that kind of guy.

Some popular blogging services that offer a categories option are WordPress, Movabletype, Typepad… Note the glaring omission of Blogger amongst that list. Grrr… Frustrating.

What’s a devoted Blogger user to do? Well, this is where tags come in. Yet, this isn’t simply the entrance of tags as an alternative to categories. No, it’s more of an argument as to why tags are better suited for this particular application (quite possibly yours as well) and, maybe to a lesser but more dramatic degree, why tags are the wave of the future and the current state of excitement amongst information organizationophiles! (So I made up the word “organizationophile.” It’s not the first time, nor will it be the last.)

So, what are tags, why are they useful, and how do I use ’em? Slow down there, champ! Let’s take this one step at a time.

Essentially, tags are one word labels designated by a human (this is important… more on this later) to describe an object. Imagine this all-too-comfy chair that I’m sitting in right now. If I were to apply tags to it, they might be: furniture, leather, comfy. It’s up to me, really. You might sit in the same chair and tag it with: chair, brown, ugly. That’s your prerogative.

What makes tags tremendously useful is their inherent organizational functionality. I can tag one post with as many tags as I deem relevant. Later on, when I (or a reader) would like to see what I’ve written concerning a certain topic, they need only click that tag, and voila! Up comes a comprehensive list of every post that I’ve tagged with that topic. What’s more, is that I can cross-reference those bad boys! Yessiree! I can see what posts I have written containing any combination of tags. That’s power. I’d like to see your wack-ass categories do that!

Tags are more than an organizationophile’s dream come true. They are a rock solid connection to the rest of the blogosphere and yes, the internet as well. With services like del.icio.us (social, taggable, bookmarking… patience, more info to follow), your tags combine with the 30 thousand (as of December 3, 2004) other del.icio.us users out there to generate a huge cloud of tags. So, if this chair that I’m sitting in was a webpage, and I truly did tag it with furniture, leather, and comfy, I could then click the tag comfy and I would enjoy a barrage of links to other objects (in this case webpages) that del.icio.us users have also tagged as comfy. Cross reference a few tags and, theoretically, I should be left with a comprehensive listing of user tagged webpages that are completely relevant to my query.

Let’s jump back for a moment. Remember our frustration with Blogger and their refusal to include categories within their service? Well, this whole tag thing solves provides a viable, and in many ways, more appropriate solution to the lack of categories provided by Blogger. This post, tagged with blogging, technology, and sambot, is now linked (via del.icio.us) to every other post that I have written tagged with any of those tags! So, clicking on blogging brings up all of my posts concerning blogging. Add technology to that query, and you’ll find all of the posts that I have tagged with both blogging and technology. But wait, there’s more! Remove from that query, the stipulation that all tags must have been entered by me, and you’ll get every webpage that has ever been tagged by any del.icio.us user with the tags blogging and technology. My posts will be within that vast list. I am now a functioning part of what the web considers blogging and technology. I’m connected. I am a recognized, categorized, and active component of this amorphous information container known as the web. That’s immense. That’s raw. That’s unfiltered and unrestrained super mega-awesomeness!

As a practical example of a tag integrated blog, please consider sam bot dot com. Notice that in the upper right corner of every page, there can be found a list of tags that I am apt to apply to any given post. Of course, I can apply as many and whatever tags that I want. However, those tags represent the most frequently reoccurring topics. That list may grow, and hopefully it will. (One thing to note at this point: I installed the tag feature on this blog just about a week ago. I did go back and tag the last few posts. Obviously, all future posts will be tagged. Past posts… well, maybe I’ll tag some of the more noteworthy entries. We’ll see…)

When you click a tag, you are automagically transported to the del.icio.us page that houses all of my posts (along with any other items) sporting that tag. From there, you can click a link from the list and zap back to sambot and enjoy the post you clicked on! However, that’s not all you can do. When visiting a specific tag’s del.icio.us page, you can choose to subscribe to that tag’s RSS feed… just like those elitist, rat bastards… er… what I mean is, those swell bloggers who employ categories within their blogs. Um… moving on.

There are a fistful of ways to start tagging your blog. As stated, sam bot dot com is using del.icio.us… it’s simple, clean, widely-used, and free (another similar option might be to use Technorati… not what I am looking for, but good luck to you!). I am using a bookmarklet (which can be found here) that automatically inserts the necessary code into my blogger entry as I’m posting. After I post, I simply tag my post’s page with the appropriate tags in del.icio.us. That’s all there is to it. Well, that’s all there is to my half-assed version anyway. Hey, it gets the job done.

Clearly, I am a proponent of the tag system. However, the most intriguing, and quite possibly the most backwards bit about the tag revolution, is the necessary level of human involvement found therein. In an online culture such as this, which we exuberantly inhabit, the human touch is oft disregarded as an antiquated ideal… especially concerning new technologies. Conversely, tagging’s success is wholly dependent on that level of human involvement. Back to the chair example: If a computer were to attempt to tag this chair, it might be able to hit “furniture” and “leather.” But what about “comfy?” No way. A computer has no concept of comfort. It is this necessary human ingredient that enables tags to break the boundaries of the technology of which it is so highly integrated. The potential power of tags as an organizational method is fully dependent on this human component.

Tagging. It’s the wave of the future. Ride that wave, baby! Ride it all the way to shore! Or something… I don’t know. I’ve never surfed a day in my life.

Would you like to know more?
del.icio.us – Learn more about del.icio.us’ awesomeness
flickr – taggable, online photo management and sharing application
FreshBlog – 3 ways to use del.icio.us for categories in blogger
beelerspace – Us.ef.ul, A beginner’s guide to The Next Big Thing
Quick Online Tips – Absolutely Del.icio.us – Complete Tool Collection
Lorelle on WordPress – Categories versus Tags – What’s the Difference and Which One?
Wikepedia – Learn about tags (see also: taxonomy)

Professor Opeth

Graduate school, shmaduate school… I’ve learned everything I’ll ever need to know from Opeth’s Mikael Akerfeldt. Really. Watch this stunning video clip (shot by yours truly, at The Palladium in Worcester, MA on 10/30/05), as the audience and I learn some crucial life skills… death metal style!

Thanks Opeth. You’ve saved me a lot of money in college loans!

Click here to watch the clip (right-click to download).

UPDATE 1: Some Windows users are reporting problems viewing the file. If you are among them, simply download the latest version of Quicktime. But, for those of you reluctant to install Apple software, I have encoded a larger-file-size, crappier-looking, yet PeeCee-friendly .avi for your perusal. Click here to give it a go. Enjoy!

UPDATE 2: From an anonymous commenter, “To listen to my interview with Opeth’s Peter Lindgren, done the night of this show, listen to my radio show, Black Night Meditations on Tuesday the 8th. http://64.140.205.96:8004/.” More information about the show and the station can be found at the Portsmith Community Radio site. The show starts at 10 p.m. Can’t wait!

UPDATE 3: Opeth is scheduled to guest on tomorrow’s Headbanger’s Ball (MTV2, 10 p.m.). Hmmm… it would be really swell if some awesome individual DVRed this show and posted a link to the download (or Torrent) in the comments section of this post. That would be simply spectacular…

Happy Birthday, Sambot!

One year ago, to this very day, almost to the hour, a legend of grand importance was born. Well, maybe not a legend per se… and definitely not one of grand importance. No, more like a pestering annoyance that one can’t help paying attention to. Like a scab… sometimes bloody, oftentimes painful, yet impossible to ignore.

Ok. That’s a pretty weak analogy. What I’m getting at is that today, October 26, is a very significant day. sam bot dot com (this blog that you’re reading right now, you dolt! Wait… don’t go. I’m sorry. I love you. I need you), turns one-year-old!

Ahhh… I can remember it like it was a year ago. It’s a fond memory, albeit fuzzy and incomplete (suddenly, I want a beer). From the very first post, to this one right here, sam bot dot com has maintained a certain level of quality. And of course, that level is… well, that’s for you to decide. But, from the deepest, darkest, pits of my heart, I humbly thank you for your patronage. Here’s to another year! L’Chaim!

Vital Stats:
– first post: October 26, 2004: Drumroll Please
– posts so far (including this one): 195
– entry most commented on: It’s a tie at 9 comments.
Confession Time… & Quite Possibly the Ugliest…
– most visited entry: Breaking and Entering

Blast from the past:
sambot version 1

A Gift From God

In other Starbucks news, god is scheduled to appear (in quote form) on Starbucks cups. Normally, I would be completely intolerant of this religious injection into an otherwise religion-free experience, but:

A) To me, drinking coffee is a religious experience in and of itself.

2) Coffee’s mere existence is proof of a godly influence over this earthen sphere. Something as majestic as coffee could only be a gift from god. Man/Evolution could never have created something so beautiful.

III) Other quotes to appear on cups come from “writers, scientists, musicians, athletes, politicians and cultural critics.” Thus elevating man to a level equivalent to that of god. And apparently, that godly level… that pinnacle of enlightenment… that plateau to which, until now, god has been the only one with authority enough to ensconce oneself upon… is none other than the elusive cardboard coffee cup.

Treehugging Coffee Addicts

Treehugging coffee addicts of Quinnipiac University rejoice! The newly opened Starbucks, here on the QU campus, offers Fair Trade coffee. And get this, it’s priced the same as Starbucks’ regular (unFair Trade) coffee. Nice!

So, what is Fair Trade coffee anyway? The Global Exchange sums it pretty nicely (and of course, Wikipedia is a good source of information too). From their article: “The United States consumes one-fifth of all the world’s coffee, making it the largest consumer in the world. But few Americans realize that agriculture workers in the coffee industry often toil in what can be described as “sweatshops in the fields.” Many small coffee farmers receive prices for their coffee that are less than the costs of production, forcing them into a cycle of poverty and debt.” Fair Trade certified coffee assures the end user that the coffee they are anxiously waiting to consume was grown, harvested, and purchased under fair conditions.

Thanks Quinnipiac. That’s really cool!